


It is Little and Broken (But Still Good)

by InkgooSupernova



Series: The Winter System [20]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anxiety, Bucky Barnes has DID - Dissociative Identity Disorder, Developing Relationship, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Domestic Avengers, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Kid Bucky Barnes, M/M, Multi, One Shot, Polyamory, Polyamory Negotiations, Sad with a Happy Ending, Short One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-07
Updated: 2020-05-07
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:29:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24057520
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InkgooSupernova/pseuds/InkgooSupernova
Summary: "You plannin' on making breakfast? I'm kinda stuck here for the time being." He chuckled, running his fingers through the other man's long hair while he slept."Figured as much," Steve hummed, nuzzling against his shoulder. "Pancakes and eggs?"The man on his chest immediately perked up.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Sam Wilson, James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers, James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers/Sam Wilson
Series: The Winter System [20]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1693231
Comments: 11
Kudos: 101





	It is Little and Broken (But Still Good)

**Author's Note:**

> This story features relationship-based anxiety and references to past abuse.
> 
> Reader Discretion is Advised.
> 
> The title is a line from Lilo and Stitch (2002)

"Mornin', doll." Steve hummed.

Sam groaned as he tried to sit up in the crowded bed. He currently had two hundred and sixty pounds of super soldier using his chest as a pillow and his arms as a blanket.

"Morning, babe." He smiled, letting his hand rest on Bucky's back while reciprocating a chaste kiss from the blond man next to him.

"You plannin' on making breakfast? I'm kinda stuck here for the time being." He chuckled, running his fingers through the other man's long hair while he slept.

"Figured as much," Steve hummed, nuzzling against his shoulder. "Pancakes and eggs?"

The man on his chest immediately perked up.

"Pam'capes." Jamesy mumbled, still riding on the coat tails of sleep. Sam laughed and rubbed his back.

"Good morning, buddy." He hummed, pressing a soft kiss to his little boy's forehead. "Wanna help Daddy and I with the pancakes?"

Jamesy scrambled off of the bed, making his way to the bathroom to clean up before helping. Sam and Steve both had a good laugh at that.

"I can handle him today if you want a break." Steve whispered. Sam shook his head.

"He's fine, Steve. Why don't you get everything ready, I'll help him get dressed." He offered, swinging his legs over the side of the bed as the other stood up. He watched as the other man stretched out his back. If he was being completely honest, he could watch the other's back muscles flex under his skin for eternity if he was given the chance.

"Sounds like a plan." Steve hummed, leaning down to press a soft kiss to his lips. Sam leaned into the kiss, resting a hand on the other's cheek.

"Daddy!" Jamesy yelped from the bathroom, followed by what sounded like a shampoo bottle falling to the floor.

"That's my que." Sam chuckled as he stood from the bed, making his way to the bathroom while Steve padded towards the kitchen.

After a good ten minutes of helping their little boy get ready for the day, Sam made his way to the kitchen with Jamesy in tow.

"Alright, lets see- Jamesy?" Sam looked around for the boy that was _just_ following him. "Jame-oh."

It turned out that he hadn't completely woken up, instead deciding to take refuge on the couch as he flicked through the streaming service options on the TV. Sam sighed fondly as the familiar Bluey theme song started up.

"More for me~" Steve purred quietly, pulling him into a backwards hug before resting his chin on his shoulder.

"Alright, lover boy," Sam playfully chided, smacking gently at the other man's arms that found their way across his midriff. "I'm hungry, and unless you want me to take my happy ass to the nearest breakfast place, I suggest we get started."

"So impatient this morning~" Steve laughed, pressing a kiss to his cheek before finally letting go and making his way to the stove. "You wanna do the eggs?"

"Considering our only options for when _you_ cook eggs is 'crunchy' or 'burnt', sure." Sam teased, fetching the skillet from the cupboards.

Before long, the smell of cooking pancakes and over-easy eggs filled the room, and Jamesy had found his way to the dinner table in a timely manner.

Steve, having finished off the last of the pancake batter, was currently slotted against Sam's back, holding him and gently swaying their hips while he tried to cook.

"Ew..." Jamesy mumbled, looking away from the both of them and focusing on his hands resting on the table. Bucky would have been all over the cuddle party in the kitchen, and Soldier would _insist_ on abandoning the breakfast and moving back into the bedroom to continue the cuddling, but Jamesy had his issues with romantic gestures like that, and that was okay. It wasn't his place to try and make him like the kind of stuff that traumatized him.

With that, Steve pulled away. Truth be told, Sam missed the warmth of the other's chest pressed against his back, but he understood the other's concern for the little boy's comfort. He would feel awful if he accidentally made him too sick to eat his breakfast.

He remembered that night with the 'incident'. He felt so horrible having accidentally hurt him.

He gave the Soldier a stern lesson about consent and safe words after that.

Once the last of the eggs were done cooking, the two men filled up their plates with their breakfast. Steve put together a plate for Jamesy before they made their way to the table.

"There you go, lamb." Steve hummed, setting the plate down in front of the little boy.

Jamesy sighed. Sam knew there was something wrong.

"What's wrong, buddy?" He prodded, taking a bite of his own pancakes. He was hungry, sue him.

"Nothin'..." Jamesy sighed again. He was a terrible liar.

"Jamesy, you know better than to fib about how you're feeling." Steve sounded just a _tad_ too stern. Sam watched as Jamesy tucked his head.

"Hey, it's okay, Jamesy. If you want to talk about it, we're always here." He piped up, shooting Steve a _look_.

Steve sighed as he sat down, eating his own breakfast in relative silence.

"...'m I bad?"

"What?" He looked up from where he was eating. "Why would you be bad?"

"Cause I can't do boyfriend stuff with you..." Jamesy mumbled. He looked so upset, like he was on the verge of tears.

"Aw, no, Jamesy," Sam stood up from his seat, walking around the table before kneeling down next to the boy. Sure, the body in front of him was taller than him by an inch, but Jamesy had that aura that made him almost look as small as he felt. "You don't have to do _anything_ you don't want to do with us. That's not for you to worry about."

"Bu'h y'u an' Daddy _always_ do boyfriend stuff t'gether," Jamesy sniffled, rubbing his eyes with the back of his hand. "An' I _can't_ an' 's not fair tha' 'm so _useless_ -"

"Jamesy, no," He cut the little boy off before he could work himself up into a panic attack right on the spot. "You are _not_ useless. Boyfriend stuff is only for grown ups, and you're _not_ a grown up."

"Bu'h I can't show how much we lov' y'u an' if I try t' do grown up stuff m' tummy hur's an-" He was cut off by Sam resting a hand on his shoulder.

"Jamesy, take a deep breath." He instructed. He counted up to ten as the boy in front of him inhaled deep.

After Jamesy puffed out his held breath, he continued.

"You don't need to show me you love me with grown up things. That hurts you, and I wont let you get hurt because of me." He explained, watching the other's face for a reaction. His eyes were flickering with thought, so he continued. "You know Bucky and Soldier can do grown up things with Steve and I because they're grown ups."

"Bu'h 's not _fair!_ " Jamesy whimpered, angrily swiping at the tears that began to leak from his eyes. "I can't do wha' Daddy an Bucky an Sold'er can do an' an' y'u're gon'a hate m' caus' I can't b' a good boyfrien' f' y'u an'-" His frightened voice dissolved into a high pitched whine.

Sam felt his heart break.

"Jamesy, I want you to listen to me," He held his hand out to him, squeezing the other's hand tight when he rested it in his palm. "You don't need to be a 'good boyfriend' to me, because _Bucky and Soldier_ are good boyfriends to me, them and Steve. You're just a little boy. You're _our_ little boy. You show me how much you love me when you cuddle me for bed time and show me your drawings and help me around the apartment. That is _more_ than good enough, because that's your way of showing love. You never have to do grown up things to show you love _anyone_. Your old daddy made you believe that was true, and that was wrong of him."

"'m sorry..." He whimpered, hiccuping on a sob.

"There's no need to be sorry, buddy," He opened his arms, letting the other's body crash into his chest. "Bucky is a good boyfriend to me, Soldier too, and Daddy too. That is _more_ than enough good boyfriends for me. Your job is to be our good little boy, Winnie too, and you're both already _perfect_ at that."

Steve sat on the floor beside them, pulling them both into a tight hug.

Jamesy's whimpers went from fast and panicked to slow and tired. He was calming down.

"'m sorry, thank'y'u, Daddy Sam..." Jamesy nuzzled into his chest, not even caring about the mess he was making on his shirt.

"There's no need to be sorry, buddy." Sam hummed, pressing a soft kiss to the crown of his head. Steve hummed in thought, nuzzling against his shoulder as he rubbed small circles into the little boy's back.

After they all calmed down, they made their way back into their seats to finish their breakfast.

It was going to be a good day.

**Author's Note:**

> **References:**
> 
> The mention of the 'incident' is a reference to the story [The Incident](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24064363).
> 
> **Brief Explanations:**
> 
> Many people with DID tend to have difficulties when it comes to romantic relationships, ranging from distrust due to past abuse to negotiating boundaries between alters and their partners. 
> 
> Jamesy, in this story, is suffering from anxiety from being unable to be a 'good boyfriend' to Sam and Steve in his eyes, such as being able to perform romantic gestures. He felt bad after seeing the way Steve and Sam were having a fun time with their quiet, domestic, romantic gestures. Many DID/OSDD systems with child alters have these same or similar anxieties due to having the mental capacity of children and, therefor, being afraid of romantic subjects or activities. These can range from sex to basic intimacy.
> 
> Relationships with DID/OSDD systems require negotiations and safety guidelines in order to ensure the safety and comfort of all alters within the system.
> 
> Any behaviors related to DID or Autism Spectrum Neurodivergency within this story are based on **personal experiences** and are not a scientific basis or professional explanation for either DID systems or Autism Spectrum Neurodivergency. No two people, let alone no two systems, are exactly the same.
> 
> Kudos and comments are always appreciated!


End file.
